Online gaming and Anxiety! Please help if you can!

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Datzackmagic

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Hello there.

I Suffer from GAD or Generalized Anxiety Disorder. When I go to play games online I Simply Can't do it. When someone invites me to a party I freeze up even then. I mainly Stick to my single player games. When Halo 3 first can=me our I was playing multiplayer without a problem. Over time however, my anxiety has gotten to the point where I simply am too nervous to play online. Wether it be COD or even Smash Bros I just can't seem to play the game online. Does anyone else have this problem? Yes I'm on Proper and prescribed medicine for my anxiety but it just acts up full swing while attempting to play online. Does anyone have any suggestions to help me out? Am I the only one?

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MayaIbuki

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I'm kind of in the same boat. I remember i did a squad game in Fortnite, my teammates were being really nice and trying to help me build but it was all just too much for me, I froze up and quit the match, or when I play Overwatch I mute everyone and the chat because it gives me too much anxiety.

I can't play anything that requires a lot of vocal teamwork or whatever. (unless I'm playing with my friends that I'm comfortable with....but even with them I try to avoid those teamwork heavy games because I get really nervous) It definitely wasn't like this when I was younger, I would play a shit ton of gears online and made so many friends that way. I'm hoping to finally get on the medication that i need starting next year, so hopefully that'll help a little!

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apewins

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I have some anxiety with new games, mostly thinking that I'm not good enough at this game until I have 10+ hours of single player behind me, and especially if it's a team based game. But I find that the match making in modern games is pretty good and no matter how bad you are, there are much worse players out there. And if it's a team based game, rest assured that if you are relatively sober and try to play for the team, you're not the one that's letting the team down.

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Efesell

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#5  Edited By Efesell

I have a lot of this, and unfortunately I've really only found that I can dampen it with familiarity. Like I've played hundreds of hours of FFXIV and done tons of group activity there but I'm still an absolute wreck to do anything that's brand new. But I find that I can just sort of take the plunge and then I'm more or less fine having broken the ice like that.

Sorry that this is more or less "just go for it", but it's kind of all I've been able to do in my experience.

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Phoenix654

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I've kind of shied away from playing online games in the past few years because of this kind of feeling... playing co-operative games with friends is something I can handle, but something competitive like Rocket League or Apex Legends just makes me feel so stressed out anymore. You're certainly not alone in this and I do not have a good fix for it, unfortunately. I've put hundreds of hours into RL and AL, but I don't know if I'll ever play either again.

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monkeyking1969

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I have had times in my life when I was good at playing online with people I know well. And, there are times when just thinking about playing and communicating with friends seems scary; which makes me sad. Currently, I can only play with normies I don't know personally on any level and don't have to interact with.

No sure if people will find this funny or sad, but I sometimes forget that my friends are playing online. I forget that they are playing Fall Guys or other games that I have been 'invited to' as a group. I find it both fan and sad simultaneously that I am so forgetful.

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yourbrain

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Like a lot of other people, I have pretty much the same thing. I don't like many multiplayer games, but I do occasionally play some rounds of the few I like. I break out into nervous sweats every time, lol. To a degree where it's real gross, tbh. Over the years I've learned to just laugh at myself (in a kind way, not a critical way!) over it. But really, I pretty much decided I am not obligated to play multiplayer and so I only do so when I am really in the mind space to want to. Even if my body seems to disagree 5 minutes in.

So really, unless you really want to play multiplayer I wouldn't force it. Games are supposed to be fun! (I think?) But, if the real problem is you want to play them, but trying flips a bad switch in your brain, that might be something to work your mental care provider with. When I was seeing a therapist, she gave me a lot of practices/techniques to help with various specific issues I was having. And helped me understand and process the underlying cause of why some situations were bad triggers for me. Or maybe even though your meds are working pretty well, maybe a different one, or an additional one would be even better. Good luck, and have fun.

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RoyalGhost

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If I get into my own head about it yeah. I kind of had to just push through it cause I wanted to play Apex. A hard mute all text and voice helped you can pretend you're playing with helpful ai.

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Shindig

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I don't actively avoid it but definitely prefer going solo. If I wind up in voice chat I just roll with it.

Life gets a lot easier when you realise very few people give a shit about people that aren't them. And there's also the obvious comparison that people deliver more interesting scraps than AI.

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wollywoo

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I don't mind games if there is limited communication, like Smash. At that point to me it's like playing against a smarter computer - who cares what they think? But any game with voice chat is a big no (unless it is with people I know, which is rare.) I played TF2 like one time and when people started talking about me I noped out and never came back. They weren't even especially mean or anything - just complaining that I was doing it wrong, which I was. But I play games to relax, and I do not need any social pressure when I am trying to relax.

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csl316

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#15  Edited By csl316

I don't play online often, but I never thought of it as an anxiety disorder. Maybe you just prefer playing alone. I certainly do for a variety of reasons. Playing on my own time instead of someone else's schedule, not having to deal with toxic communities, relaxing with a game by myself, etc.

I remember when I was way into Starcraft, I'd get nervous when it was time to hit the find match button. So I eventually stopped playing and got more into games that didn't revolve around individual performance as much. BTB in Halo, conquest in Battlefield, etc. That could be a way to put less pressure on yourself, too.

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MrGreenMan

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I dealt with this ages ago by not playing games online with others. I just do not get enough enjoyment from it, and I far to often just get more frustrated and upset playing with others than by myself. Getting older doesn't help with this as well. I'm not sure if this is an appropriate or even healthy answer honestly. I've been doing this for about 10-15 years and really I don't miss it at all. Anytime I do attempt to play a game that is online with other people, especially if it's something I think I may be interested in. Within an hour of playing I absolutely regret that decision of wasting my time and money. I know well enough what I like, and online games is just not one of them.

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Fistoh

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I also have GAD, and there are definitely times where I feel unable to play online games, which especially sucks since I happen to be into a lot of multiplayer focused games. I always stress around my individual performance and feeling the need to prove myself. I find that remembering that ultimately no one really cares and I just need to do my best and try to enjoy myself helps me jump into online games more often, but it still definitely comes up a lot.

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BaneFireLord

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I'm not diagnosed, but I definitely have some sort of anxiety complex and as a manifestation of that I cannot do random multiplayer stuff that requires team coordination at all...talking live to internet strangers is Not Great for me. That said, I've still played a lot of multiplayer games over the years, which I do by either playing with my real life friends who are pretty laidback and not hardcore about their multiplayer games, or by soloing in lone wolf modes or modes where the teams are big enough that communication isn't necessary. So I guess my suggestion is to find a group of people to play with on the regular that are explicitly not there to do high-tier, high-pressure play. Or just stick to single player, there's zero shame in that...this is supposed to be a fun hobby, after all, and you shouldn't feel obligated to push through anxiety because of some sense of FOMO.

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stantongrouse

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I thought I had social anxiety but recently starting therapy it's more an issue of very low self esteem and clinical depression (not the diagnosis I was expecting), but I've always had a problem with dealing with online gaming, even with people I know in real life. I get terrible "I'm not good enough, I've let people down" trains of thought which can make online gaming no fun. I've not yet got to the point where I'm happy to hop in with voice chat with strangers, but games where there they can work just as well with very little direct communications with your team have been my entry to getting more online games I enjoy. Rocket League has been surprising with how accessible and easy for me to get into its been and while the recent free to play model has upped the rage quits I see the community in general has stayed pretty good. But other games I thought would be pretty bad that turned out okay for low interaction were War Thunder and Forza Horizon. I hope you find your spot to get some games in, and remember, even if it doesn't happen right away keep plugging at it when you feel good enough to do so and it will fall into place for you.

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nicolasgarcia

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It's brave of you to open up about your struggles with anxiety, and know that you're not alone. I used to be in a similar boat. Multiplayer games used to be my jam, but as my anxiety crept up, they became more daunting than fun. First off, kudos for seeking help and being on proper medication. That's a big step. Anxiety can be a tough beast to tame, and it often takes a multi-pronged approach.

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RuthNewmanL9G

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#27  Edited By RuthNewmanL9G

While medication helps many, it's not a one-size-fits-all solution. Have you considered therapy or counseling alongside your meds? Sometimes, having someone to talk to can make a world of difference. As for gaming, remember it's supposed to be fun, not stress-inducing. Maybe try easing back into online play in small doses. Start with games or modes that feel less intense to you. There's no shame in sticking to single-player adventures if that's where you feel most comfortable. Also, I checked out the link https://www.mentalhealth.com/disorder/dementia/paranoia-and-delusions-in-dementia-patients. If you're looking for resources on medications for borderline personality disorder, I'd suggest checking out mental health websites or consulting with a healthcare professional.